What happens now Chapter two

[cillab42]

Morning found Jensen in the same position. Even though the overhead light made the window surface reflective, and he couldn’t see anything, he kept up his continuous stare. He slept maybe an hour, but the noise from the pipes in the old house startled him awake before continuing his vigil at the window.
Jensen was well rested, as long as he slept for an hour he was fine. He hadn’t slept more than an hour a night for the past six years because laying in the dark waiting for your enemies to come for you, robbed a person of the ability to sleep soundly.
Despite the lack of sleep, he was refreshed and was still enjoying his ability to sit in one place without being disturbed or harassed. After warning him that this was the one and only time she would allow it, Loretta had even let him take his meal there last night.
His trance was interrupted by a soft knock on the door, and the sound made him freeze. Who was it and what did they want? Was last night only a reprieve, because there was only one thing the others wanted from him?
“Jensen, it’s me, Loretta,” the woman’s childlike voice interrupted his solace.
With a heavy sigh, Jensen reluctantly moved from his spot and opened the door for her.
“May I come in?” She asked as though he had the right to deny her entrance.
Stepping aside, Jensen opened the door wide enough to let her in and walked over to sit on the side of the bed as he waited for her to tell him the reason for the visit.
Instead of talking right away, Loretta walked over to his window and looked outside. He wanted to yell and scream that it was his, to get away, but he kept his cool and waited until she was ready to speak.
The longer she was quiet, the more nervous Jensen became because he’d learned that silence was never a good thing. It reminded him of the way the guards had behaved before they sold him to another prisoner or guard on another floor. They often did it to make their lives easier.
It usually happened when Sterling was in solitary, because, despite their being armed and all, they were scared of the man as well.
He thinks that he bought Kripke’s last car.
“Why didn’t you tell me Jensen?” she asked finally breaking the silence.
“Tell you what?” he asked confused as to what she wanted him to confess. Oh shit, what did Kripke do him now? “What am I being accused of this time?”
“Nothing, baby, nothing. Why didn’t you tell me that you’d been exonerated? Henry and I fought about giving you this room when there is a parolee who has earned it, but… It’s just that most of these guys would have come in here bragging that they were innocent, but you said nothing.”
“I’ve been saying that for over seven years,” he told her as he shrugged his shoulders. “No one believed me before and most don’t believe me now. Kripke knew, but that didn’t stop him from forcing me to my knees in full sight of the six other passengers and the bus driver. I just assumed that like everyone else, you didn’t care. My family didn’t.”
“Is that why you’re here and not home with them because they didn’t care?”
“To be fair to them, I’m not sure if they cared or not because they couldn’t be bothered to answer the calls.”
Fuck! He was not going to cry; he told himself as he tried to blink back the tears. The weight of them were as heavy as his burden of letting his family down, and one slipped past his defenses.
“This was not your fault Jensen and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise,” she told him as she placed her files on the bed and pulled him up into an embrace. “You were just a kid and the adults in your life failed you, but you’ve got a second chance. Don’t waste your life on people who threw you aside when things became too hard.”
He let the other tears fall as she soothed him. She was not his family, but she gave him what he needed most right now, love unconditional and pure. He knew that she knew or at least guessed what happened to him, but she held him as though he was still the sixteen year-old kid who never had been kissed.
She held him and let him cry. Even when the silent sniffles became loud sobs, she held him and didn’t let go and for the first time in years, six to be exact, he felt safe.
When he had finished crying Loretta gave him time to reign in his emotions before saying, “We’re having a group meeting in twenty minutes, so clean yourself up before coming down. Just know that a lot of the things - well most of them will not apply to you, the big one being that you can leave without a chaperone. The biggest one that you’ll have to stick to is that you must be in the house by ten p.m. unless it involves work or a support group. The rest we’ll discuss later because I’m going to have to make up some new rules for you to help you get on your feet.”
“How - how long will I be allowed to stay here?” he sniffed.
“Normally only six months, but since you were wrongly convicted by the great state of Texas, you’ll be allowed to stay here as long as you need to. You’ll have to contribute to the meals like everyone else, and I’d like it if you help with the chores, but you’re not bound to do that either.” She gathered up her files and told him, “Now clean yourself up and meet me downstairs.”
Once he reigned in his emotions, he followed her downstairs and found two available seats left. He had a choice to sit between Chad and Paul Wesley or Justin Hartley. His first choice was on the sofa with Hartley, but when he moved to sit down, he did a man spread, spreading his legs, so they took up the entire sofa. It was his way of telling Jensen without words that he wasn’t welcome to sit there. A quick glance at the other sofa told him that he would not be welcome there either, and he wasn’t sure what his next move would be.
A quick glance around the room showed him that two men, neither of whom Jensen recognized and Mike were in the chairs in the back of the room, perhaps he should just go stand in the corner.
As he waged an internal war, Loretta made a sound, and he knew that she was going to say something. He knew that she meant well, but her interference was going to make things worse, so Jensen pushed aside his fears and moved Hartley’s leg and sat down.
She smiled at his bravery and began to recite the rules to the new arrivals. She started with what she’d already told him about the food and the cleaning and pointed to the duty roster. Even though he was paying attention to what she was telling the group, Jensen could feel all eyes on him.
Loretta must have noticed, and interrupted her speech, “Gentlemen, and I do use that term loosely, do I need to remind you that you are no longer in prison and those rules no longer apply. If your name is down to clean the bathroom, then you clean the bathroom. If you attempt to force someone to do your chores or even offer to pay them, then you will get points and depending on what you do, a trip back to your cell.”
“That’s not fair,” Chad mumbled. “If someone volunteers then I don’t see the problem.”
“This is not my first rodeo, Mr. Murray, so this is my way to keep you all honest. You all are not even a day into your freedom, and you still have a prison mentality. If I see someone doing a chore they weren’t assigned to do then it’s a point for both of you. Now I know you want to know what the points are and how they are earned, I have conveniently posted them next to the duty roster. If you ever have a question on whether something will get you in trouble, then it probably will. You each start with a total of 100 points, mess up and they’ll slowly get you in trouble. Six months is a long time guys.”
“What’s the biggest point earner?” Paul asked.
“That’s simple, sex. There will be no sex in this house, consensual or otherwise. Being caught is a 50 pointer. I’d hate to think that someone will go back to jail because they couldn’t keep it in their pants. Also in case you’re wondering fighting is an automatic trip back to jail, so keep those tempers in check as well.”
“Aw Jenny, how are you gonna survive?” Hartley cackled.
“Leave him alone!” Crazy Mike Rosenbaum warned from the back of the room. “You bastards got away with that shit on the inside, but I dare you to fuck with him now.”
“Mr. Rosenbaum?” Loretta asked as she looked through the file she held in her hands to make sure. “There will be no threats or intimidation either.”
Jensen swears that he saw her give Crazy Mike a small smile even though she was stern with the older man.
“As I stated before there are rules and rosters posted in all of the common rooms, so I highly suggest that you read and learn them. If you have any questions, Ty and David are both about to be released and go to their lives, so both will be able to answer them for you.”
Like everyone else in the room, Jensen turned to get a look at the men Loretta was talking about.
“I’m Ty,” a tall, good looking man with a thick southern drawl introduced himself.
“And that makes me David,” an equally handsome black man pointed to himself. “If you have any questions, please come to us and we’ll help you through it.”
“They only have a few weeks before they go to their real lives, so take advantage of them while they’re here. Do you guys have any words of wisdom for the newbies?”
“Yeah,” Ty said, “Please don’t wait until you’ve racked up 99 points before you realize that you need guidance. Keep your goal in view and work towards it.”
“Also keep in mind what Loretta just said, that this is not prison and that the same rules do not apply,” David began. “It’s no longer a dog eat dog world. You’re a civilian again. Act like it.”
“I couldn’t have asked for a better segue-way if I had planned it,” a tall, dark-skinned man piped in from the door of Loretta’s office. “I’m Aldis - Aldis Hodge and I’m your parole officer. It’s my job to make sure that you guys stay on the straight and narrow. Part of that includes making sure that you realize that you are now in polite society and the rules that you’ve lived by the past few year no longer apply.”
All of the men in the room became silent, and Jensen was glad that he didn’t have to deal with the tough looking man. He seemed to be the type to give you just enough rope to hang yourself and would be glad to send a person back.
Jensen watched as the P.O. Turned towards Chad before continuing, “You want a quick fuck, then find some little thing on the street, but you pull that jailhouse shit here… especially forcing someone to have sex with you, that’s an automatic 100 points, see in the real world, we call that rape. Some of you are gonna fuck up; that’s a given and unlike Loretta, I’m not going to coddle you because you’re grown ass men who know the difference between right and wrong. The first time you truly step out of line I have a pretty pair of silver bracelets to wear when I escort you back, we clear?”
“Here are their files,” Loretta handed him the thick stack of folders she’d been carrying.
“Now that we’ve had our come to church meeting, this is what’s gonna happen now. Y’all are gonna sit here like good little boys and I will call you in alphabetically and tell you what I expect from you. Murray, you’re up first.”
“Me? Last time I checked Ackles came before Murray,” the blonde snarked.
“Don’t question my order,” Aldis barked, “now move your skinny ass and get into the office.”
When Chad jumped up from his seat, Jensen stood up from his and made his way to the back of the room where Mike sat smoking a cigarette.
“Good luck guys,” Ty told them as he and David left the room.
“Um, thanks,” Jensen managed after he managed to come up with something that didn’t sound stupid - well worse that what he managed to say.
“No problem,” Mike told him before he took another drag on his cigarette.
“The slut and the psycho,” Paul Wesley commented loudly from where he stood just inside the door-frame. “What a pair.”
“Fuck you, Wesley,” Mike told the other man.
Jensen felt his face burn with the words. He knew that he’d wasn’t a slut, but it was hard to believe when he thought about all of the men who’d had him even though it had been against his will. He wished that he could throw an insult the same as Mike had, but all he could do and hang his head in embarrassment.
“Paul would you like to be the first to earn points?” Loretta asked, “Because that can be arranged.”
“No, mam,” he shook his head and glared at Jensen in a way that told the young man that this wasn’t the last of this.
“Why’d you do that?” Jensen asked in a whisper.
“Look,” Mike spoke with the cigarette dangling from between his thin lips. “My first day in the joint, I was scared shitless and I tripped over my own feet and banged my head on the wall. No one saw me trip, all they saw was a crazy motherfucker hitting his head against a brick wall. Right then and there I was labeled psycho and even the meanest son of a bitch in the place was too scared to come near me. That night when all of the other newbies were screaming through their initiation, I was safe.”
“Wish I’d have thought of that,” Jensen told him as he marveled at the simplicity of Mikes plan.
“Not so sure that it would have worked for you,” Mike told him as he shook his head. “You were in for raping a kid, and you were gay on top of that. Even if you’d been batshit crazy, the results would have been the same, there would have been no mercy. Those bastards watched your trial and followed your story on the news as it was soap. When it was first announced that should you be convicted, you would be coming there, you were bought and sold within fifteen minutes, and you belonged to Sterling Brown.”
Jensen could only stare at Mike in disbelief. Lies had landed him in prison, and his life had been dictated and taken out of his hands since the moment he’d been sentenced. Now he was in limbo waiting and depending on others to help him get his life in order.
“I couldn’t do anything for you, hell no one could. I think even Kripke was a little scared of Sterling. I couldn’t help you then but I can now, but you need to help yourself as well. You’re a big fucker, learn to use that size. Here there’s no Sterling, Kripke or gangs; it’s just you and them. Loretta will tear them a new one if she catches them fucking with you, but you gotta show a little backbone. Get it through your head that you’re not behind bars any more so stops behaving as though you are.”
Before Jensen could respond the P.O. was ushering Chad out and calling Mike’s name, but the other man gave Jensen something to mull over.
The next few days was a period of adjustment for everyone, but Jensen learned a couple of things in that time. Mike was right, physically, he was free, but emotionally he was still JA32451. And he would be until he learned to live instead of survive.
To do that he would need to leave this place. It was nice that he had his room, but he needed his own place. Somewhere he made the rules and didn’t have to avoid minefields in the form of Chad or Paul.
He could have an entire house to wander around instead of staring out of one window. He could have a garden. The thought of a little vegetable patch made him smile because it brought back memories of helping his granddad in his vegetable patch as a child.
He needed a job.
Every morning after a short nap just before sunrise, Jensen walked to the convenience store on the corner near the house to get a newspaper. A computer would probably be faster, but conveniently, there was always someone on the one at the house, so he resorted to low tech.
After several days of searching, he managed to land an interview and the thought of being on his way to total freedom excited him. The excitement lasted until he hung up the phone when he realized that he had nothing to wear except the clothes he wore from the prison. Well, those and a couple pair of jeans that Loretta had given him that a previous resident had left behind.
He had money, but no way to get to a store or a mall. Thinking about how he was going to get something to wear, he almost gave up. But then it occurred to him that if he let something like this get him down then he would never get anywhere.
He’d just have to learn to ride the bus. Or he could call Jeff. Hadn’t the man told him numerous times that if he needed anything just to give him a call? He hadn’t spoken to the man since he left prison, and this was important.
“Hello,” a soft feminine voice answered Jeff’s cell.
“I’m sorry,” he stammered, thrown off when someone else answered. “I must have dialed the wrong number.”
“Are you looking for Jeff,” the voice asked.
“Yes,” He answered as he tried to decide whether or not to hang up.
“I’m his wife Hillarie, the idiot left his phone this morning, but he’s on his way to get it now. If you give me your name and number, I’ll have him to return your call.”
“Jensen Ackles,” he told her before giving her the number of the phone he was using.
“Jensen… Ackles?” She asked with none of the friendliness from before.
“Yes,” he confirmed warily.
“I’ll tell him you called…”
The promise was interrupted by a deep voice saying, “Hi honey.”
Jeff didn’t come to the phone. Instead, Jensen could hear the pair whispering furiously, and he was sure that he heard his name. By the second mention, he was in the process of hanging up when suddenly Jeff’s deep voice was on the line.
“Hey, Kiddo,” Jeff greeted.
There was a deep tiredness in Jeff’s voice this early in the morning. He knew how much time the man had spent on his case, and if he was doing the same for others, then Jensen wasn’t surprised. He smiled at the sound of his friend’s voice, and he pictured him rubbing the back of his neck as though that action was going to relieve some of his stress.
“Hi Jeff,” Jensen answered.
Now that the lawyer was on the phone, Jensen was unsure of what to say. In the past, their time together had always been about his case. It seemed that he was always trying to find the next witness, rereading a police report or going over old evidence. Now that Jensen was free, he didn’t know what to talk about.
He considered them so but were they, friends?
“Jeff, I have a job interview,” Jensen blurted out.
“That’s great Jensen!” Jeff congratulated him. “I’m sure you’ll do well if you don’t let your nerves get the better of you.”
“I - I don’t have anything to wear and I was hoping that you could help me.”
“I’ll see what I can do,” Jeff told him after a brief silence. “I’m so proud of you…”
Jensen’s pleasure at the man’s praise was short lived when he heard Hillarie urging him to hang up. Not wanting to hear his friend lie about why he was ending the call, Jensen decided to end it first.
“That’s great Jeff, look I’ve got to go, Loretta gets angry if we don’t do our share around here,” he said with a forced laugh.
They said their goodbyes and Jensen stood there staring at the phone feeling as though he had lost the one constant in his life, and for the first time in the past six years, he felt alone. He stood there staring at the phone as though it was going to provide him with an answer.
“Jensen, are you okay?” Loretta asked when she walked into the office a few minutes later.
“Yeah,” he attempted to lie, but the shake of his head told her differently, “not really.”
He explained his situation and how for once he didn’t believe that Jeff was going to come through for him.
“I’m on my way to go grocery shopping because y’all eat everything that isn’t nailed down. How about you tag along and we make the thrift store our first stop and find you something to wear.”
He gave her a small smile and followed her to the car.
“I understand that you want to be prepared for your job interview, but don’t give up on Jeff,” Loretta encouraged.
“I understand that he has more than my case, it’s just that he’s all I had for the past six years,” Jensen explained.
“While you were locked up, you focused on his visits, they gave you something to look forward to, but in the real world, he has obligations both professional and familial. Once you have a job you’ll have something to fill your time, and you’ll make friends and it won’t seem that the time in between you see Jeff will be that long.”
Jensen let her words sink and realized that she was right. Jeff had more than him in his life, and Jensen would have to adjust. The conversation lightened his mood so much that he and Loretta were laughing and joking by the time they reached the thrift store.
The trip to the thrift store provided Jensen with something he hadn’t had in a long time, fun. There were serious fashion changes in the past six years, but Jensen went for the classics, jeans, khakis and button downs. Only spending a little over sixty dollars he managed to get a great start on a new wardrobe and find a great MP3 player with some of his favorite music already downloaded.
The mood in the car on the way to the local Piggly Wiggly was a far cry from their earlier car ride. Jensen was feeling good about his purchases and Loretta was trying to educate him on what was and was not good music. Jensen goaded her by telling her that he had no clue what she was talking about. He left out the fact that he and his friend Chris sang some of the songs she mentioned when they’d played some local gigs.
He was laughing and giggling and for once he felt carefree and none of his baggage was there with him. The carefree feeling carried into the store where he was able to choose what he wanted to eat. He and Loretta had a list they followed but because Jensen was there, and he had the extra money, without the threat of someone stealing it, Jensen was able to purchase fresh fruit that he hadn’t been able to enjoy for years.
He’d told Loretta about the money from Henry’s church, and she’d suggested that he set up a bank account so that he wouldn’t have the extra cash on him.
The others would soon realize that he had more than the allotment that was given to him by the state, and she worried about him. Sure the person taking it would be punished but he could still get hurt. If he got the job, then they would think that the money was from his pay, but until then she wanted him to be safe.
Jensen took her words of caution to heart and agreed to go to the bank tomorrow after his interview. He put some of his things back and limited himself to some fresh fruit, candy and coffee.
“Jensen, will you go to the next aisle and grab some sugar and flour and we’ll be through,” Loretta asked him.
“Sure, no problem,” he told her before he sprinted to the adjoining aisle.
Smells of chocolate and spices greeted him as he stepped into the aisle dedicated to all things baking. As he concentrated on trying to decide the difference between self-rising and all-purpose flour, a voice at the end of the lane stopped him dead in his tracks.
“Mama?”
Standing there in the middle of the Piggly Wiggly was his mother, his brother Josh and a pretty blonde girl who looked just like the old pictures of his mother. She had to be his little sister, Mackenzie. They were talking to a woman he didn’t recognize, but judging, by the way, his mom was smiling at her she was probably someone from church.
When he didn’t get a response, Jensen walked closer and repeated a little louder, “Mama.”
Donna Ackles turned and looked at him and said, “I’m sorry, but I don’t know you,” before turning back to her conversation as though Jensen never spoke.
“It’s me, Jensen,” he identified himself. He knew that he’d changed a lot since she’d last seen him. Perhaps she didn’t know who he was.
“I don’t know a Jensen,” she told him with a sneer on her face. “You must have me confused with someone else.”
“But…” he started.
“She said she didn’t know you, asshole so back off,” Josh barked at him as he pushed his sister behind him as though Jensen was going to attack her.
Despite the way his family was treating him, Jensen felt the desire to make them understand that they had no reason to be ashamed of him because he was innocent. He wanted to explain that he’d been released because everyone had lied and that now he could come home, and they could be a family again. He wanted to but as he stared at his family he barely recognized them because the hatred on their faces transformed them into people that he didn’t know, the words stuck in his throat.
As he tried to force them out, he felt a hand on his shoulder from behind.
“Jensen, I think that you’re confusing these people for those who once cared for you. Let’s leave them alone, we’re finished here.”
Numbly, Jensen allowed Loretta to lead him towards the cash registers. Hopelessly, he threw a last look over his shoulder hoping that one of them would change their mind and call out to him, but no one did.
He could feel the cashier’s eyes on him as he helped Loretta place their items on the belt, but he didn’t care. It wasn’t until he was outside, and he saw his reflection in the car window that he realized that he was crying. All of the hopes he’d pinned on his family accepting him back died at the baking aisle when his mother denied knowing him.
Had Jeff been in contact with them, did they know why he’d been released? Surely they couldn’t know that and still not care. Josh’s reaction wasn’t a surprise. Not really. Josh’s parting words in court told Jensen what his brother thought of him, but if he were honest, it still hurt.
“They’ll come around,” Loretta tried to reassure him as they loaded the mini-van, “we can call them later and explain to them that you’re innocent, and you’ll be back home where you belong.”
Pasting a smile on his face, Jensen removed the last bag from the shopping cart and took it to the cart corral and was back at the van when he was slammed into the side of the vehicle.
“What the fuck were you trying to accomplish,” a furious Josh Ackles snarled at him.
“You can talk to him, but I’ll be damned if you think you’re going to hurt him!” Loretta said as she stepped between the two men, “now let him go.”
The indecision showed on the older Ackles face, when the woman advanced towards him, he stepped away from Jensen.
“Is this good?” he sneered. When she nodded he turned back towards his brother, “now why are you here? You’re supposed to be still in jail.”
“Where else am I going to go, Josh?” Jensen asked in a small tinny voice. “I tried to call you before I was released to let you guys know, to come hopefully home, but no one answered Jeff’s calls.”
“Why would we talk to him, and open wounds that we were trying our best to close. Haven’t you caused use enough hurt and embarrassment? Just. Go. Away.”
“But… I” Jensen stuttered and stopped as Josh moved closer to him and made him feel threatened. Everything that he’d wanted to tell his brother fled his mind and was filled with images of Sterling Brown causing him to hyperventilate.
“Look at you,” his brother spat, “when there’s a little boy involved your faggot ass is all big and bad, but let a man get in your face you cry like a little girl. It took mom a long time to be able to face people - to leave the house even. Now that she’s finally comfortable being in public you show up and ruin her life. Again. Do us a favor and stay away from us.”
“That’s enough!” Loretta told Josh as she moved to usher Jensen into the van.
Jensen didn’t watch as his brother walked away he just stared ahead as Loretta got in and drove away. The ride home was silent, the earlier excitement destroyed under Josh’s attack as Jensen tried to pull himself together before they arrived back at the house.
Loretta called ahead and asked that Ty and David help her with unloading the van while she took care of Jensen.
She escorted the young man to his room and laid him on his bed without any protest. Once she was sure that he was alright she headed downstairs to her office where she placed a call to Jeff and persuaded him give her Josh Ackles cell number. It was the time she and that young man have a come to Jesus meeting.
Loretta had closed the curtains, making it dark in the room when Jensen woke an hour later, causing him to panic because he forgot where he was. When he saw the light peeking through a small opening in the curtains, he remembered. He was not back in his cell waiting in the dark for Kripke to send someone in to him.
A quick glance at his watch told him that it was almost time for dinner so after a quick trip to the bathroom, he made his way downstairs hoping that he wasn’t too late to help. He wouldn’t get any points, but he didn’t want the others to think that Loretta was giving him special treatment.
As he entered the kitchen, he could hear laughter and the camaraderie of the guys as they prepared the evening meal. It all stopped when he entered the room.
“Well, it looks as though the pretty princess has decided to join us after the work has been done, huh?” Chad sneered. “Well it earned you some points and even your savior can’t stop that.”
“Enough, Mr. Murray,” Loretta snapped. “We will respect one another here and if you keep it up, you’ll see some points on the books for you.”
“Just take a seat brother,” Ty told Jensen, “we’re almost finished here.
Not wanting to cause any more trouble, Jensen made his way to the dining area to sit at the large table, and as Loretta was reaching for something in the refrigerator, Paul and Chad took advantage. Both men bumped into him. They both laughed knowing that he was not going to retaliate, but the laughter died quickly when Mike shot them a threatening look.
“Dinner’s ready,” Mike announced once Chad and Paul scattered. “Jen, I got you, just save a seat for me.”
Once Mike placed a plate in front of him, Jensen concentrated on his food and listened to stories from Ty, David and Mike as he let the day’s event go for the moment.
After dinner, Jensen made sure that he stuck around to help with the dishes. Cleaning the kitchen was a chore for everyone and Jensen didn’t want to beg off because he had a fucking emotional day. He wouldn’t share with anyone here, one of the first things you learned in prison was not to trust anyone because that would get you killed or make you wish you had been.
“You are gonna have to toughen up, man,” Mike informed him as they sat on the large front porch after they finished kitchen duty. “I don’t know what happened today, but you’ve got a private room, you hold that shit in until you close that door so these fuckers won’t have anything to use against you.”
Sucking in a lungful of air to give himself time to collect his thoughts, Jensen looked at Mike and wondered if he could trust the man.
“I can see everything you’re thinking on your face right now man,” Mike laughed. “This ain’t prison and I don’t need anything from you.”
“It’s just - I saw my family today and my mom pretended that she didn’t know me,” Jensen blurted out.
“Fuck man that’s rough. I don’t know if I could have made it if I didn’t have someone on the outside,” Mike shook his head in disbelief. “You got an early release - that has to mean something to them. Per…”
“That’s just it,” Jensen interrupted, “it wasn’t an early release, I was exonerated, my charges were dropped. Jeff uncovered DNA evidence that proved that I couldn’t have done what they claimed that I did.”
“Fuck man! Wait,” Mike said as though the thought just occurred to him, “if you had your charges dropped why you are here?”
“Because I have nowhere else to go,” Jensen put his head down so that Mike couldn’t see his embarrassment before continuing softly, “my family didn’t want me.”
“That’s a whole new level of fucked up.”
“What about you?” Jensen asked. “Where will you go in six months?”
“I’ll live with my boyfriend, Tom.”
“You’ve been locked up what, six-seven years? Do you think that your boyfriend would wait for you?”
“I’m in here because of Tom. He’d just graduated law school, and we decided to celebrate. Tom had a friend who was able to get us our pharmacy, we had some roxy, and some weed. A lot of weed. We were driving, and the car wasn’t so steady on the road, so they pulled us over. When they found our stash, I was sober enough to say that it was all mine. Even though in was on the seat beside us, I told the officers that Tom didn’t know it was there. As long as they had someone confessing, they didn’t care.”
“Why would you do something so stupid? If he loved you so much, how could he let you? Your Tom probably forgot about you by the time Kripke turned the key in the lock,” Jensen huffed.
“Nah, he came to see me every week. He’d just graduated first in his law class and had passed the bar on his first try. There were firms cutting each other’s throats to get him, and I wasn’t going to let him throw that away over a stupid mistake.”
“And you think he loved you enough to wait?”
“It’s been almost a decade Jensen and I’m sure he’s fucked someone other than his right hand, but that’s just sex. What we have is so much more than that. One day Jensen, you’ll know that kind of love and when you do, you’ll understand the sacrifice.”
“See that’s how I know that you’re wrong, because who’d want someone as used to me?”

The next day Jensen was nervous. He had his first interview at a small insurance office. After days of being locked in solitary, Jensen discovered that he could escape by getting his GED, and the next logical step was college. There was no way that he was going to get the degree in architecture as sixteen year old Jensen had dreamed of, so he settled for a business degree.
He and Loretta had spent the night making his résumé look as good as possible, but there was no meat to it, and that had Jensen worried. He knew that he was going to explain why he had never had so much as a job bagging groceries at the Piggly Wiggly. The only thing he could do was explain his wrongful conviction, and he wasn’t sure that he was going to be able to get through that.
“Mr. Ackles, you’re next,” the pretty little brunette interrupted his internal meltdown.
Squaring his shoulders, Jensen stood up and followed her into the office and sat I the chair as that secretary instructed him to. He handed the woman behind the desk his résumé and began to study his feet.
“Is this your idea of a sick joke?” a voice bit out with barely restrained anger making Jensen’s head snap up.
Swallowing the bile in his throat, Jensen stood up so fast he almost knocked the chair over. The woman on the other side of the desk was Juliana Ford, Colin’s mother.

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