The One worth Suffering for chapter 5

[cillab42]

Once they got to the house Jensen hesitated before entering, remembering the last time he was there. As he reached for the doorknob, he remembered another time when the door had not been locked and he entered and his body began to shake at the memory.

Before he could totally give in to the memory, he felt Jared’s body flush against his, warm and comforting, murmuring in Jensen’s ear low and soothing, “It’s okay baby, it’s okay.”

The two men stood there until the tremors stopped. Once Jensen stopped shaking, Jared reached around and removed his hand that was still attached to the doorknob, turned the key and opened the door. Jensen sucked in a deep breath, entered, and almost cried at what he found.

Jared had changed …everything. Gone was that lumpy sofa that Jared loved. Instead and had been replaced by a leather sofa that looked buttery soft and was flanked by vintage tables. The table and chairs had been replaced by a vintage set that Jensen had been eying forever in the local resale shop. The walls had gone from a boring tan to a chocolate brown with white trim. A quick glance towards the stairs showed the pictures had all been reframed and hung. Everything looked, smelled, fresh and new and the love Jensen felt for Jared at that moment was trying to fight its way out of his body and physically manifest itself.

“Tired?” Jared asked.

Shaking his head, Jensen answered “No,” he really was but he was going to put off going upstairs as long as he possibly could.

“I changed it as well Jensen,” Jared responded as though reading his lovers mind.

“I don’t think…” Jensen started before Jared grabbed his arm and led him down the hallway to his old office.

Jensen would have launched himself into Jared’s arms but for the fact that the action would cause every part of his body to hurt. What Jared presented him with was amazing; it was a new bedroom decorated in shades of blue and white. Because the room was larger than the one upstairs, it was able to hold the huge bed that they had both been coveting for the past two years. It was a retreat that was peaceful and more importantly, terror free.

Jensen made his way to the large bed, eased down onto it and began to undress himself. Jared, seeing that Jensen was struggling, walked over, kneeled down in front of Jensen, and helped him undress. They first removed his socks and shoes, but when Jared stood up and reached down to unbutton Jensen’s shirt. Jensen looked up and the sight of Jared standing over him transported him to another time to another room, to another man. Suddenly he was back there, a big man holding his head calling him sweetheart as he violated his mouth and battered his body.

Jensen was on his hands and knees struggling to breathe around his attackers cock while being assaulted from behind. He was screaming nonononono, begging for them to stop, but no one could hear his muffled cries and the men attacking him just laughed. When they finally finished Jensen scrambled to the corner of the bedroom and began to rock back and forth. He was so locked into his nightmare that he did not feel Jared’s hands carding through his spiked hair in an attempt to soothe him as he rocked back and forth against the headboard repeating the litany of no’s.

Jensen must have fallen asleep because the next thing he knew he waking up and it was still light outside. He felt horrible about freaking out on Jared who had gone through all of the trouble to make coming home a pleasant thing, but

Jared standing over him triggered a flashback to the attack. He looked op and suddenly he was back on his knees struggling to breathe. How long that would last, this reliving the single worst moment of his life. Jensen was broken out of his reverie by the sound of his phone alerting him that he had received a new text interrupted his reverie.

Reaching to the bedside table, he flipped open the phone to read the message. It was the same unknown number as before.
Has Jared confessed yet? Did he tell you what his business was about when he went out of town?

Still groggy from sleep, Jensen tried to focus on what this person was trying to say. Who was this, and why did they keep texting him about Jared’s trip? In the back of his mind, he knew that this was important, but he wasn’t sure why. Closing his phone, Jensen made his way to the den to apologize to Jared.

“Thanks for calling man, but he’s still sleeping Chad,” He heard Jared telling their friend “I don’t know, he was getting undressed and just freaked and I don’t know why.”

Jensen must have made a sound to alert Jared that he was in the room because he looked up as soon as he entered and ended the call. “I’ll have him call you when he’s up to it.”

“You okay, Jensen?” Jared asked, his concern making Jensen feel even guiltier.

“M’fine,” he muttered his face red from embarrassment, “God Jay, I’m not sure what happened… I just, don’t. I am so fucking sorry”

Jared carefully made his way to where Jensen was standing and attempted to reach out to his partner, but when Jensen’s entire body flinched before he could make contact, he dropped his hand.

Jensen felt tears well in his eyes at his actions, he so wanted Jared to hold him close and comfort him, but he didn’t know what was going on inside his head. Just like this afternoon, Jared wasn’t trying to initiate sex, Jensen knew that, but suddenly he seemed so huge and menacing and the thought of how those huge hands could bring pain instead pleasure was forefront in his thoughts.

“Um, was that Chad?” Jensen asked in an effort to make things normal, but the look of hurt on Jared’s face told him that he had failed.

For a moment, Jared looked as though he wanted to ignore Jensen’s change of subject, but instead he answered, “Yeah, he just wanted to make sure you were alright. He wanted to talk to you, but I didn’t think you were up to it.”

Trying to ease the awkwardness, Jensen nodded in agreement and announced, “I’m starving how about you?”

“Yeah, I picked up a hamburger while you were asleep and was just sitting down to eat. What flavor protein shake do you want today.”

Making a face he joked; let’s go for the strawberry this afternoon, I haven’t had that since this morning.”
Jensen drank his ‘lunch’ while he salaciously watched as Jared ate his hamburger, “When I can eat again, that will be my first meal.”

Jared looked at him and grinned, “Awww I’m hurt, and somehow I thought that I would be the first thing you ate.”
Jensen laughed in response as much as his wired jaw would allow, but had Jared looked close enough he would notice that it didn’t reach his eyes.


Samantha Ferris turned to her partner as the car came to a stop in front of the victim’s home. “Look Sheppard, I know that you don’t like the way I’m handling this, but I have a reason for keeping things from Palecki.”

“What about Ackles?” Sheppard asked. “Apparently he can’t yet remember what happened, why can’t he know? Why keep him in the dark?”

“Look all of their friends knew about Morgan, he was no surprise, but this second guy? He’s a mystery to us and Morgan won’t talk. I believe it’s one of their friends, and I want to be able to observe them all just a little longer before I spring this on them.”

Thinking it over, Sheppard looked at her and said, “Okay, I’ll play along, but just so you know had you said because you’re the lead detective, I would have told them as soon as he opened the door.”

Ferris knew that Sheppard thought that she was a hard ass, okay, knew she was a hard ass, but she wouldn’t pretend to be someone she wasn’t. She treated life as harshly as it treated her, and besides, she was more experienced on this job than her partner who had only been on the force for ten years to her twenty. Ferris also knew that because she stood back and observed while he soothed and petted and tried to become their fucking BFF, she learned more about people than Sheppard ever could.

She saw things like the love Jared and Jensen had for each other and how guilty the giant felt for leaving his partner alone. Her problem with him was what she had found out about him, that maybe he wasn’t as honest as he pretended to be, but only time would tell on that. It would probably help them work better as a team if she shared more of her thoughts and feelings with the man who sometimes was the only thing between her and death, but she just couldn’t be bothered, so instead she just grunted at Sheppard and rang the doorbell.

Ferris couldn’t read Padalecki’s face when he opened the door, but the body language told her that he was unhappy about something.

“Mr. Padalecki,” she greeted with a false smile. Turning towards Sheppard, she asked, “You remember my partner, Mark Sheppard.”

“It’s Jared,” he countered reaching out to shake the hand offered by both detectives. “Please come in.”

As they entered both officers could detect the faint smell of fresh paint, and when they entered the den area where the attack had begun, well, it didn’t take a trained police officer to notice the changes. The entire room had been redecorated and so had the wall leading up the stairs. Samantha was sure that if she requested to see it, the bedroom probably had been changed as well.

The other noticeable thing was the interaction between Padalecki, Ackles and the good Dr. Murray. Murray was standing beside Ackles as though guarding the man, and instead of taking the spot on the new sofa beside his partner, Padalecki sat in the oversized chair across the room. Interesting.

Jared must have noticed the police officers looking at the changes in the room because he said in defiance, “I was told that the scene had been released, so I changed everything. I wanted Jensen to come to his home, not a crime scene.”
Walking over to the sofa where Jensen sat, Samantha shouldered Dr. Murray out of the way, and sat down next to him and said sweetly, “Oh, I didn’t mean to infer that you did anything wrong, I was just admiring the work. It’s beautiful.”
Still smiling, she turned towards Jensen and lied, “How are you feeling Jensen, you’re looking well.”

In the course of their investigation, she had been shown pictures of Jensen before the attack, and he was gorgeous, confident and carefree, and could understand Morgan’s fascination with him. However, the man sitting beside her today was a mess. The bruises were starting to fade, and the majority of the swelling had gone down, but he still looked as though he had gone a couple of rounds with Manny Pacquiao.

“M’fine,” Jensen mumbled through his wired teeth.

She could tell that this was not going to be easy, sending a look to Sheppard, she began her questioning. “Jensen, can you tell me what you remember about that night?”

Taking a deep breath, Jensen hesitated before he responded, “Not a lot really. I remember being in the restaurant and I remember feeling at ease when Jeff left.”

“Why is that?” Sheppard asked from across the room.

“Usually he stays until we, that is Jared and I, leave. I was expecting trouble because Jared was not there with me, but he did nothing. He didn’t speak to me, or make repeated trips to the restroom or accidentally touch me. He spent the night texting someone.”

“So on a normal night he tries to make contact with you?” She asked

“It had gotten so bad that we started going to a different restaurant, but he just followed us there,” Jared answered. “Since we always sit at the same table, we try to make sure that Jensen does not sit near the aisle so that there is no “accidental” interaction.”

“It’s like the fucker had this planned,” Chad alleged. “But then he has had years to do that since you guys wouldn’t do anything about him. Is it because they’re two men? Is it because they are gay?”
Samantha pursed her lips and literally bit her tongue to prevent herself from saying the first thing that entered her mind. Instead, she glanced at Sheppard, whose nod let her know he was going to go along with whatever she said next whether he agreed or not.

“Mr. Murray.”

“Dr. Murray,” Chad corrected.

“Dr. Murray,” she corrected herself as though he had not interrupted her, “the law comes first with us. It does not matter race, creed or sexual orientation she quoted. I am sorry that Jensen was not taken seriously, but let me do my fucking job, and we can get through this.”

Mark Sheppard thought that this would be the time for him to step in, not caring whether Ferris was lead or not. If he let her continue, they were going to be kicked out with nothing to go on.

“Dr. Murray,” he started, “we know that you only want to protect your friend, but being hostile with us is not the answer. Yeah, the police screwed up by not taking Morgan’s threats seriously, but let up and let us put him away.”
When Chad looked as though he was going to protest, Sheppard asked softly, “Please?”

Chad looked at the detective and sat at the other end of the sofa, watched as Ferris turned to Jensen, and asked, “I know that you have been over this before, but go through that evening for me again.”

Taking a deep breath, Jensen began, “There really was nothing different about the day, and we all met at the Bistro and were having a good time. I was in my usual spot with my back against the wall where I could see everything.”

“Nothing was out of place at all?” She asked. When he answered no, she continued, “What about someone new joining you?”

“No, Aldis is the newest member of our group, but he has been coming to dinner with us for the past six months.”

“Did any one leave early? Sheppard asked.

“Actually Morgan did,” Jensen remembered. “He had been texting someone all night and then he left.”

“What about someone in your party?”

“Chad did because he was called in for an early shift, then Jake, Misha and I, we all left at the same time.”

“Dr. Murray,” Ferris stressed his title, “Who can verify that you were at the hospital?”

“You can contact my attending,” Chad answered and gave her the attending supervisors name and number.

“Jensen,” Ferris asked, “You said you, Misha and Jake left earlier, why?”

“I was tired,” he responded then blushed as he continued; “I thought that the tiredness might be one of the first signs of pregnancy.”

“Any…” Ferris started, but was interrupted by Jensen

“Oh God, I wasn’t pregnant was I?” Turning to Jared and Chad panic showing in his eyes, Jensen asked, “I didn’t miscarry did I?”

“No, you weren’t pregnant, Jensen,” Jared rushed to assure him, not daring to look at the others in the room because they knew there was no way that Jensen could have possibly have been pregnant.

Biting her tongue Samantha figured that it was best that she leave now. Nothing would have pleased her more than to call Padawhatthefuck out on his shit, but the only person here that would get hurt would be the person who was already hurt and that she wouldn’t do.

“Here’s the problem Jensen, she began, everyone there has the same story, so we pretty much know what happened at the restaurant, but we need to know what happened when you got home.” She paused because she knew that thinking about that night was going to cause the man stress, but they had to know what happened in case Morgan recanted.

Inhaling a deep breath, Jensen replied, “I really can’t remember past that. Every now and then I get flashes of things, but not enough to tell you anything.”

Standing up, Ferris turned and gave the three of them her spiel. “You guys have my card; please we really want to help so call if you have anything. You never know the things you don’t think to be important can break a case wide open.”
Chad followed the two detectives outside while Jared calmed Jensen, “You know he had a concussion and head injuries can impede his memory, right?”

“Yeah, we know that, but we also know that any little thing can trigger it as well.” Sheppard replied. “Just call us if he remembers anything.” Then he turned and walked to their car.

As the two of them watched Dr. Murray walk back inside to his friends, Sheppard said, “That little bastard knows something and I’m going to find out what it is if it kills me.”


previous next